@andypiper Here's the cocktail you asked for! I call it the Oregon City Vision Screwer.

Fill a cocktail shaker with ice. Into this pour the juice of 5 kiwi fruit. Add 2 measures of moonshine, 4 measures of slivovitz and 5 measures of schnapps. Top up with tonic water. Shake unconvincingly for 17 minutes, then strain into a champagne flute. Enjoy!

#JohnMastodon has cast those pearls before you. Do with them what you will.

@jaeger @dnalounge I heard #JohnMastodon programmed this from his watch

@donthatedontkill The Log Lady asked me to tell you this:

The beautiful thing about treasure is that it exists. It exists to be found. How beautiful it is to find treasure. Where is the treasure, that when found, leaves one eternally happy? I think we all know it exists. Some say it is inside us - inside us one and all. That would be strange. It would be so near. Then why is it so hard to find, and so difficult to attain?

#JohnMastodon has spoken.

@shoko
No. The meme is televangelist and millionaire hypocrite Joel Osteen.

That's not handsome enough to be #JohnMastodon . The reason you don't see many pictures of John Mastodon is because photos of him have caused women to swoon so badly that they faint, and marriages to collapse because women can not resist his mere image. No man can measure up to him-- handsome male movie stars would leave Hollywood in despair at being unable to compare to him, and plastic surgeons would become overwhelmed with requests to make men more like him.

It would be quite dangerous to the public if we were to post actual photos of John Mastodon.

@AmyZenunim it's like #johnmastodon 's dog

@cstross

It was the year of the first wrist mounted computer.

[Photo was taken in John Mastodon's computer laboratory. The subject is believed to be "Pip" Boyer, the developer of the first portable computer.]

@MOULE #FediverseChick would melt into a puddle if exposed to #JohnMastodon's 100% non-toxic masculine virility.